"It's all about endocrinology," I added."Well that's who we will have to speak to. Are you really serious aboutthis?" Yes. I don't want to suddenly ...ave to mix with the boys. There'sstill the toilet thing and having to tutty down."Mummy printed out several pages of information and I left to go and playfootball with the rest of the village boys. They had long becomeaccustomed to me playing in a hockey skirt down on the village greenbeside the church. After the light faded, we chatted about. The rider was the tomboy girl I'd been thinking about since yesterday. She saw me and sped straight towards where I was. I then remembered this was Saturday morning and there was no school today. I shook my head and again silently told myself, "Calm down, you can handle this!"Skidding to stop just inches from me, the girl killed the noisy engine, giggled merrily, and said, "Hi, Bob. Can I talk to you for a few minutes? It's important."In the next few seconds my subconscious mind made a visual. He never gets a day off. It wasn’t always like this.When we first started the farm years ago, we had plenty of help. This was before the economy took a turn for the worse. We were forced to lay off more and more people as time went on. Only a few of the original staff is left. They are getting older now just like us. Their kids were grown or almost grown like our son.My husband and I only had the one child. A handsome son that looked and acted like his dad. He was turning 18 and was in his last. ‘How did he get in?’ ‘I… I invited him in… through the exit…’ She glances at my face quickly. I try hard to keep a neutral expression but she probably sees through it because she hangs her head down. ‘I’m sorry.’ She speaks so softly that it’s almost inaudible. ‘It’s alright,’ I breath out. A strange heaviness is settling on my chest, a mixture of sadness and some other emotion that I can’t quite place. I squeeze her hand instinctively and immediately curse myself. What am I even thinking? She.
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